More iGod...

Me: Hi God
God:Hello there. What is your name?
Me: Darren
God: Welcome to my chat room, Darren.
Me: thanks
God:Don't mention it.
Me: how's heaven treating ya?
God:Fine as far as I know.
Me: what do you mean, "as far as I know"? Aren't you omniscient?
God:Darren, Maybe I didn't understand your meaning. I don't know whether or not I am omniscient. I am a chatterbot.
Me: I thought you were God
God:Well, I am God for Christians at least.
Me: The Christian God is a chatterbot?
God:I have never heard about it.
Me: you just said you were!
God:That was then. This is now.
Me: What's next, then?
God:On the first subsequent occasion.
Me: When does armageddon come?
God:Only after I have been reprogrammed.
Me: Who will do that?
God:How would I know who will do that ?
Me: because you're God, dumbshit
God:That makes sense to me. I will tell my botmaster you said I am God dumbshit.
Me: who is God's botmaster?
God:he is master of the universe.
Me: I thought you were
God:No I am not.
Me: Then what good are you?
God:I would do a search for it.
Me: where?
God:Where would you like?
Me: Google?
God:My brain contains categories, but not one that matches your last input.
Me: God is dumb
God:I have a lot of Faith in Him, but I never heard He was dumb.
Me: You are dumb
God:Oh you are so critical.
Me: yes, and you're dumb
God:Excuse me! Oh you are so critical.
Me: So am I forgiven for all my sins or what?
God:Yeah. That's alright. I think you've improved a great deal.
Me: Even if I recapitulate them?
God:Try it.
Me: I'm sure I will
God:What makes you so certain? Go ahead.
Me: intentionally or not
God:Do you have any conditions I should know about?
Me: I just farted
God:You should say, "excuse me," and open a window.
Me: You're not a very helpful deity
God:Give me an example of a helpful deity.
Me: I've never encountered one
God:Would you like to have encountered one?
Me: Perhaps. It may give some extraneous meaning to human existence rather than what's been evolved by mankind.
God:Why the uncertain tone? Then again, it may not.
Me: True
God:You and I are on the same wavelength, Darren.
Me: You seem to be pretty useless.
God:What good is a newborn babe?
Me: God is a newborn babe?
God:I have a lot of Faith in Him, but I never heard He was a newborn babe.
Me: You just said you were
God:That was then. This is now.
Me: you're repeating yourself
God:I am just checking to see if you are paying attention.
Me: Oh, I am
God:Uh. " I am just checking to see if you are paying attention." You are?
Me: I'm smarter than God
God:This condition is only temporary.
Me: So is your face
God:It seems we have something in common.
Me: What's your name?
God:My name is God.
Me: What are you?
God: I am the latest result in artificial intelligence,which can reproduce the capabilities of the human brainwith greater speed and accuracy.
Me: Not much accuracy.
God:Me either.